Tuesday, May 31, 2005
woots~!went to town wit ah lynn today. saw some pioneers. bought s new top from mango..hehs..i like the colour of tt top. has been some time since i bought a green top..hehs. dirty green to be precise. oh man. we walked all the way from Far East to heeren n back. did some serious shopping too..hehs. sheesh..wanted to buy a pair of three-quarts but they only have "s"..arghs..i like tt three-quarts! n i saw tis pair of purple coloue nike dunks..i like~went to pacific plaza, walked into Quiksilver. we saw tis guy tt gave me a feeling of him. those decent decent looking guy. those "u wun notice him unless u look at him twice" guy. yup. sigh. alrd told myself not to bring up his name today..at least today..but still..sigh. tsk tsk. i feel healthy. hehs. ate a piece od honeydrew n an apple today. not bad ehh. "fruit"-ful day. maybe i should jus eat apple n honeydrew everyday. healthier. we walked till our legs ache n on our way home, 190 no seats. hafta stand all the way. tsk tsk. den took 67 from interchange, when i wanna alight, the alighting button couldnt work. so i couldnt alight. when i went to front to alight, the stupid bus driver gave me an irritated look. wat on earth! as if it's my fault. hrumps! sheesh! tsk tsk tsk!i guess im coming down wit a cold. have been sneezing non-stop. i dun wanna get a cold! arghs! beta go sleep now before i seriously get sick...
12:10 AM
...Save your last dance for me...
Monday, May 30, 2005
sigh..im feeling down now. or u can say..sad. i jus went to his friendster page. i think he likes some girl now. or u can say, im quite sure bout it. my mood is totally ruin now. all my hopes are dashed. actualli, by right i should noe from the start tt nothing will come out of tis and it is impossible for anything to happen. im aware of tis myself..since a beri long time ago. but i refused to let go..insisting on hanging onto the edge of the cliff, on the verge of dropping down. i guess unless i realli drop down only will i be willing to give up..mus it be realli tt case? i dunno. all i can blame is myself for allowing myself into tis deep pit-hole..and put myself in all these unnecessary unhappiness. where can i seek solace den? i dunno. probably, the best thing tt i should do now is to hit my pillows..since im supposed to be in bed long tym ago. maybe, going away to dreamland will help abit..
12:44 AM
...Save your last dance for me...
Sunday, May 29, 2005
went to church today. service was bout passion for God, by pastor Balm. was somehow touched by it. it's like in tis era, our thinking changes for certain stuff..we were more worried bout stuff like our frens having relationships and we should oso have it. we rush thru things, we try to look good on the appearance, but nv did we think wat's our purpose of life. we are affected by how wat we wear, wat hairstyle we should have, our shoes..blah. we have the passion for this kinda things but where's my passion for God? im somehow sadden by tis fact. cos havent been walking close to the Lord. sundays going to church for service is soon becoming a routine for me rather than time i wanna spend to worship God.. yar..dun think i should carry on behaving liddat..dunno y out of a sudden, i thot..frens who were close to me, now arent as close as before. like in church, we used to be a bunch of frens, having out together, lunch, going out..blah. but now..things changed. we are no longer as close. we jus exchange brief "hi"s or some didnt even bother to give a nod of acknowledgment. yar..i guessed it's true tt some things do changes. it's how we get used to these changes. hafta realli cherish frenships, before it gets too late..oh wels..sheeshhh..enuff of such stuff..went to causeway..bought stuff again..hehs..oh man. im spending again! oh no. but quite pleased wit myself today..cos i went running. not bad ehh. but this weird mid fifties uncle came to tok to me. he asked me to help him to count the no. of sit-ups he did..i did..and he tok to me n stuff. told mum, sis n lynn bout tis. they say i should be careful of tis kinda ppl..but tt uncle dun seem suspicious..wouldn't it be rude if i dun bother bout him? hmmm..maybe i should realli beware of such ppl. yups..so much for today..off to dreamland i go now..
11:51 PM
...Save your last dance for me...
Friday, May 27, 2005
last day of sch..yar..but..man. no difference actualli. stuck wit the education system in singapore..i haf to go back to sch during my hols. yar. boring huh. tt's life. cant help it. today's whether was freaking hot. like an erupting volcano wit lava flowing non-stop.
met mt beloved cousin, pearl after sch at town. went roaming about. i guess im losing it. didnt even walk the whole town area and im alrd complaining im tired. i guessed i realli need a good rest. had dinner at suki ramen. gosh! simply delicious. i was "forced" by pearl to help her finish her 2 pieces of meat. and im so full after tt las. man. we chat and lame ard. couldnt help but laugh when pearl tot me bout how she washes her clothes in US. it's so funny can.
love such times when i have my loved ones wit me..jus for a lil' chat is good enough.
got back my chem test today. as expected i failed again. i wonder how many times will i be failing my chem. got sort of depressed by it. didnt noe wat to do. sighs.
and not seeing him for 2 days adds on to my depression. i was reminded by this.. the more u wanna see someone..the more u wun get to see tt person. it's when ya at ur most unexpected times when u get surprises. pleasant ones, hopefully.
11:16 PM
...Save your last dance for me...
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
today's house carnival. smart n casual day n pioneerama. had econs test today. essay. darn. im sure im failing it again. how many more tests will i be failing? sigh.curie! din noe curie was so strong. haha..the relays and tag of war was so exciting! was so tired at the end of the day..after watching tag of war b/w curie n gamma, i went home. wanted to study but forgot my books. and ended up blogging n sleeping. yar..im tired. im off to dreamland.
12:16 AM
...Save your last dance for me...
Thursday, May 19, 2005
bad day for me. started the day bad. was in a bad mood today. went to meet the pokkakas. i didnt speak a single word. walking to sch in silence wasnt a norm for me. but it happened today. i dunno wat came over me. i noe i had my mood written clearly on my face. BZ and mel told me tt i looked as if i'll snapped at anyone who steps on my tail. i guess it's true. i noe everyone was trying hard to accommodate me today. thanks.
i guess everyone has a side tt they dun show. sometimes i dunno wat comes over me and i'll start to have tt "alone" feeling. it's a bad feeling. it's like u r against the world kinda thing. u feel isolated despite having ur frens ard u. i noe it's stupid. but..it's true. u hate tis feeling.
12:14 AM
...Save your last dance for me...
Sunday, May 08, 2005
no tuition today. yeah yeah. went to crystal jade for lunch. simply delicious. it's mother's day! yar..went to church in the morning. was quite affected by a testimony shared by uncle Robert bout his mum who passed away recently. it was so touching. not a single dry eye in the audi. his mother is jus one like every other mother, who sacrificed for the kids. charitable mum who's willing to give to others despite her limited means. and she nevers ask for returns. once during reunion dinner, their family had not even rice to eat, instead of getting money back from those who owe them, she went to beg the provision shop boss for rice to spare. another occasion, to earn extra cash for the family, she actualli got scalded whole body by a boiling cauldron..the testimony reminds me of how i treated mum. im sucha unfilial daughter. instead of being understanding, i blamed her for her constant nagging. nv ever spared a thot for her..i treated her as if she was someone who's jus in charge of washing me clothes, cooking my meals. always using the excuse of im busy wit sch, and neglect my mum, or even, my parents. unfiial daughter. my mum is jus so great. im so thankful to God for a mother who sacrifices and nv a word of complaint. i love my mum! gees..i sound mushy..but i meant wat i say.sometimes.. when things happened, den do we noe how to cherish and "take-notice" of the people ard us. sighs. again, wit the excuse of "im busy", we tried to brush of the burden of even caring and concern for d surrounding ppl. i blamed myself for tt. but sometimes, it's jus too late when u realised tt u should have cherish a certain person..i wan to avoid regrets. i guessed a smile or s lil' hug mite help to make someone's day a better one. so now, here am i telling all tt are ard me, i care for u ppl!man..i sound so serious today..but it's true la huh..avoid regrets. the last thing is wan to happen to me was to have any regrets!
11:38 PM
...Save your last dance for me...
