Saturday, July 08, 2006
feeling really sad today. one of the days when im unusually sad. the supposedly well-planned saturday outing is gone. all my anticipation and looking forwarded is gone. the words said were hurtful but no, i don't blame anyone. yes, tears rolled down. sure, there are friends. but i guess nobody really understand. friends and family are my source of motivation. they are just like my hands. without any, i'm like a girl without parents. weird analogy but the idea's there. i guess it's because of their great importance in my heart that made me so sensitive towards losing or hurting anyone.
i try my best to not neglect anyone. and give my best to keep a friendship but does anyone ever see the effort put in and tears shed. many times, there's this inner voice knocking on the door in heart, saying "forget about it. just give up. no matter how hard you try, nobody appreciates your effort. they just think that you are so foolish." but yet, i refused to give up. because, i've always believe, "trust that your friends will not let you down. trust that God will help you. trust yourself." as long as i believe, i'll see the light of hope. so it's the same this time, there's disappointment. there's tears. but there's hope too. the tears and disappointment will change to hope and belief.
i maybe be still feeling upset about the whole issue. but hey. i'm melissa char. just some chocolates and ice-cream will do wonders to me. and tomorrow's granny's death anniversary. and i remembered how she had always faced every sickness and pain with the glimpse of hope in her eyes. yes, i've always remembered her words. the actions she demostrated in her life just constantly reminds me, " to believe".
believe that nothing is impossible. have faith in the people around you, for people who are worth your tears, will not let you down. that's my belief :))
PS. sorry. today's entry's rather heavy hearted and serious. but don't worry peeps. i'll be alright. i'll be back soon :))
